Friendship Revisited

I recently wrote a blog post on Friendships. It was broadly based on the book by Robin Dunbar on the same subject. Subsequently I came across other good reads which strengthened my understanding of friendships.

1. Mark Manson explains in detail the key aspects of making friends as an adult in this blog post. Key takeaways are:

• Making friends is a skill that can be learned and improved through practice. To make friends, you need to take action and put in effort, which may involve stepping out of your comfort zone.

• Proximity is essential for forming friendships. To increase your chances of making friends, be present in various social situations, join groups, and participate in activities with like-minded people.

• Initiating contact and showing interest in others are key factors in making friends. Start conversations, ask questions, listen attentively, and express interest in the people you meet.

• Developing personal boundaries and understanding your values can help you connect with others and foster genuine relationships. Be authentic, be yourself, and prioritize compatibility when making friends.

• Be aware of the common barriers to making friends, including laziness, fear of rejection, lack of time, and busy schedules. Address these barriers head-on by planning, prioritising social activities, and accepting that rejection is a natural part of the process.

• Deepen friendships by being vulnerable, sharing experiences, and having meaningful conversations. Emotional connections are essential for building lasting relationships.

2. This article in The Atlantic by Hanna Rosin introduces a new take on the topic of soulmate. Why should soulmate always relate to people in romantic relationships? Can your best friend be your soulmate?

Highlights of this read:

• The concept of a soulmate is traditionally associated with romantic relationships, but friendships can offer equally deep connections that greatly impact our lives.

• A friendship can be a reliable source of love, emotional support, and personal growth, as it allows individuals to grow both separately and together.

• Friendships can provide emotional, physical, and mental benefits without the potential issues that can arise from romantic partnerships.

• Research shows that friendships can lead to better life outcomes and overall happiness, contributing to reduced stress, improved health, and increased life expectancy.

• The unique elements of friendship, such as unconditional love, consistency, and encouragement, allow it to evolve in a way that can offer a deeper understanding of oneself.

• Recognizing and valuing the importance of friendships in life can help individuals appreciate their connections and build lasting relationships.

3. This read from the Sloan Review published by MIT highlights how to make good friends at workplace.

Take home points here:

• Workplace friendships can increase job satisfaction, improve performance, and enhance collaboration and innovation.

• Many professionals believe that it is essential to have a "best friend" at work to feel engaged and supported in the workplace.

• There are four types of work friends: helpers, boosters, mentors, and idealists. Helpers offer practical assistance, boosters provide emotional support, mentors give guidance, and idealists inspire and push for growth.

• Engaging in meaningful conversations, expressing gratitude, offering help, and sharing positive experiences can foster friendships.

• Creating a sense of belonging through rituals, traditions, and a shared identity can also help strengthen relationships.

• Employers should provide opportunities for employees to make friends by designing workplace environments that encourage collaboration and shared experiences.

• Remote and hybrid work can present challenges for creating meaningful connections. It's essential to adapt these strategies to digital contexts and promote connections within distributed teams.

4. And, finally a fun read on 85 questions you can ask a friend to strengthen the bond. Try this with caution.

In the present age of social media and decreasing importance on relationships these articles remind us that conversations, memories and the good vibes we create with friends are what makes us more human.

When did you last talk to your best friend?